Fear plays a very interesting role in my life and probably in many of yours as well. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that we welcome fear. And why do we? Well, because it’s a good safety mechanism. It stops us from doing things that would put us in danger, but the problem is when it starts to dictate our every thought, our every action, our every decision. Fear can paralyze our minds. And, what’s worse, society ingrains this debilitating fear into every single child as he or she grows up - it becomes their second nature. It never leaves us! I’ve spent a great deal of my life making decisions out of fear and let me tell you, it is extremely exhausting! Because I was a puppet being strung along by the judgment of others, and when I didn’t live up to their expectations, it really crumpled my sense of self-worth. Then one day, I stumbled upon this video on Youtube where the woman asked me whether I make my decisions out of fear or if I make them out of growth. This shift in perspective changed everything because suddenly I started to put my happiness first and realized that fear shackles you like a prisoner in the shadows. But growth frees you from the chains of apprehension, allowing you to look beyond your limitations and into yourself, where you see the bigger picture and take action to step out of the shadows.
We all have limitations. We may struggle with family tension, you may struggle with medical issues, yet others may struggle with money problems. And our mind will immediately make us doubt our capabilities to deal with our problems: Maybe we think we’re being selfish or maybe it's impossible. And it’s so unfortunate because doubt is one of the main barriers that stop us from reaching our full potential. The main problem we all have is that we don’t ever try to overcome the doubt. Instead we need to be of putting our foot down and saying how do I overcome this, how do I do I fix this? Well, it’s simple.
Stop running from it and start facing it.
Brendon Burchad
Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take power over the things you can control instead of obsessing over the things you can’t control. And obviously it’s much easier said than done because fear has played such a huge role in letting doubt haunt our lives. Yet we need to let our desire for growth supersede our fears, and never look back even when doubt becomes a heavy burden on your shoulders.
Next, look at the bigger picture. For me at least, in the past, the mindset behind why I did things were actually quite trivial. The reasons why I went to the gym was because I was insecure and the reason why I studied so hard for good grades was to please my parents and for them to say, “I’m proud of you”. And for as long as I can remember, I was always jealous of other people, whether it was their appearance or a higher grade on a test, I felt like I was in a whirlwind of constant dissatisfaction. But one day, I was scrolling through Youtube and stumbled upon a video. Her name was Anna Akana and she told me,
No one can ever be you, no one is you. So there’s really no sense in feeling any kind of competition
Anna Akana
What she said really hit home and as I thought more and more about it, I gradually started to believe it. Then for the first time in my life, I stopped feeling jealous or threatened or insecure because I stopped being scared about what others thought. And, it feels really good because I decided I wasn’t going to let fear keep me in a glass bubble but instead, I decided to make a move and shatter it to pieces. I created a healthy mindset and started to make decisions that helped me grow as a person instead of letting fear dictate what I do.
Now you might be thinking well, where do I start? How do I start making my decisions out of growth and not out of fear? It all comes down to taking action. When you are able to identify the root causes of your fear, then you can start learning how to overcome them. And of course, there will be challenges, but the key is to do it anyway. So the next time you make a decision, if you are doubting your capabilities, or you’re feeling anxious or scared, ask yourself this, “Will I still be better for this experience?” Because that’s the bottom line, right? Every decision you make out of self-growth will allow you to master your fears and ultimately allow you to live life to your fullest potential.